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Truth in Dark Times

Semargl

During the dark times in your life you will find out who is really there for you, who loves you and who doesn’t. You will find out who will go to bat for you, and who likes you for what you are, and not what you have. You will find out who you can trust and who you can’t trust. You will find out who talks trash and who will tell you the truth even though you may not like it.

Dark times put you in check and will allow you to see who is fake and who is real. This is good because you can identify those who you should not waste your energy on and not let them rent space in your head.

No matter how laid back and cool you are, there will always be someone who doesn’t like you for no reason, its life. We’re all ugly to someone, fake to someone, stuck-up to someone, ain’t shit to someone, a loser to someone, a bitch to someone but who cares.

Make your money, pay your bills, and take care of your family! Hating on me won’t stop my ATM card from working. Hustle until your haters ask if you’re hiring and don’t worry about what someone else thinks, if they don’t know you personally, don’t take it personal. Nobody can steal my joy, because they didn’t give it to me.

I’ve seen better days, but I’ve also seen worse. I don’t have everything I want, but I have everything I need. I woke up with some aches and pains, but I woke up.  My life may not be perfect, but I am blessed.

Life is like toilet paper, either you’re on a roll, or you’re taking shit from some asshole.

Q• How do you double the value of a Yugo?

A• Fill the tank with gas! (If it can still hold liquid. If not, put a can of beer in the back seat.)

Q• What do you call a Yugo that breaks down after 100 miles?

A• An overachiever.

Q• How do you fix a broken Yugo?

A• 1) Lift off the radiator cap.
A• 2) Push off cliff.
A• 3 drive brand-new one underneath radiator cap.
30-mile/3-day warranty included!)

Q• What is found on the last two pages of every Yugo owner’s manual?

A• A bus schedule.

Q• What do you call the shock absorbers inside a Yugo?

A• Passengers.

Q• What does a Yugo have in common with a Ferarri?

A• A Ferarri can go from 0 to 60 in 4 seconds.
A • A Yugo can go from 0 to 4 in 60 seconds.

Remember the Yugo? Jason Vuic would like to remind you of its not-so-illustrious story. The Yugo: The Rise and Fall of the Worst Car in History is Vuic’s book on the tiny, no-frills, breakdown-prone automobile imported from communist Yugoslavia in the 1980s that is better known today as a punchline than a piece of machinery that might (or might not) take you from point A to point Y.

Donald Trumps Magic Trick

Donald Trump and Hilary Clinton made a joint visit to a bakery while campaigning. While in the bakery, Hillary sneaks three pastries in her pocket, and whispers to Trump, “See how clever I am? The owner didn’t see anything, and I didn’t need to lie. That’s why I’m going to win the election.”

Trump says to Hillary, “That’s so typical of you: trickery, deceit and theft. Now I’m going to show you how to get the same results honestly.” Trump says to the bakery owner, “Give me three pastries and I’ll show you a magic trick.”

The baker gives Trump three pastries and he eats one after the other. The baker was wonder what the magic trick is and asked Trump, “So? Where did they go?”

Trump says, “Look in Hillary’s pocket.”