This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries, but, now we know. It requires a bit of explanation.
If you work too hard, there’s never any time for her.
If you stay home and do the housework, you’re a pansy.
If you don’t work enough, you’re a good-for-nothing bum.
If you cry, you’re a wimp. If you don’t, you’re an insensitive bastard.
If you try to keep yourself in shape, you’re vain. If you don’t, you’re a slob.
If you buy her flowers, you’re after something. If you don’t, you’re not thoughtful.
If you want it too often, you’re oversexed. If you don’t, there must be someone else.
If she has a headache, she’s tired. If you have a headache, you don’t love her anymore.
If you’re proud of your achievements, you’re full of yourself. If you don’t, you’re not ambitious.
If you appreciate the female form and sexy underwear, you’re a pervert. If you don’t, you’re gay.
If you ask her to do something she doesn’t enjoy, that’s domination. If SHE asks you, it’s a favor.
If you mention how nice she looks, its sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, its male indifference.
If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race, you’re a male chauvinist.
If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape, you’re sexist. If you don’t, you’re unromantic.
If you get a promotion ahead of her, that is favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, its equal opportunity.
If you make a decision without consulting her, you’re a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she’s a liberated woman.
If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, this is exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your lazy behind and find something better.
Why do men die first? Because they fucking want to!