Mosques in America

I am truly perplexed that so many Americans are against another mosque being built in the United States. I think it should be the goal of every American to be tolerant regardless of their religious beliefs. Thus the mosque should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance.

That is why I also propose that two nightclubs be opened next door to the mosque thereby promoting tolerance from within the mosque. We could call one of the clubs, which would be gay, “The Turban Cowboy,” and the other a nude bar called “You Mecca Me Hot.”

Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork, and adjacent to that an open-pit barbecue pork restaurant, called “Iraq of Ribs.” Across the street there could be a lingerie store called “Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret,” with sexy mannequins in the window modelling the goods.

Next door to the lingerie shop there would be room for an adult sex toy shop, “Koranal Knowledge,” its name in flashing neon lights, and on the other side a liquor store called “Morehammered.” All of this would encourage Muslims to demonstrate the tolerance they demand of us, so their mosque issue would not be a problem for others.”

Yes, we should promote tolerance, and you can do your part by passing this on and if you are not laughing or smiling at this point… It is either past your bedtime, or its midnight at the oasis and time to put your camel to bed!!!!

Q• How do you double the value of a Yugo?

A• Fill the tank with gas! (If it can still hold liquid. If not, put a can of beer in the back seat.)

Q• What do you call a Yugo that breaks down after 100 miles?

A• An overachiever.

Q• How do you fix a broken Yugo?

A• 1) Lift off the radiator cap.
A• 2) Push off cliff.
A• 3 drive brand-new one underneath radiator cap.
30-mile/3-day warranty included!)

Q• What is found on the last two pages of every Yugo owner’s manual?

A• A bus schedule.

Q• What do you call the shock absorbers inside a Yugo?

A• Passengers.

Q• What does a Yugo have in common with a Ferarri?

A• A Ferarri can go from 0 to 60 in 4 seconds.
A • A Yugo can go from 0 to 4 in 60 seconds.

Remember the Yugo? Jason Vuic would like to remind you of its not-so-illustrious story. The Yugo: The Rise and Fall of the Worst Car in History is Vuic’s book on the tiny, no-frills, breakdown-prone automobile imported from communist Yugoslavia in the 1980s that is better known today as a punchline than a piece of machinery that might (or might not) take you from point A to point Y.