Mouse Disguised as a Snake to Keep Predators Away, Nature is Wonderful

Mouse Disguised as a Snake

HatTipcanstockphoto53073149  A Herd of Turtles


 

A Woman in A Hot-Air Balloon is Lost…

So she shouts to a man below, “Excuse me. I promised a friend I would meet him, but I don’t know where I am.”

“You’re at 31 degrees, 14.57 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude,” he replies.

“You must be a Democrat.”

“I am. How did you know?”

“Because everything you told me is technically correct, but the information is useless, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve been no help.”

“You must be a Republican.”

“Yes. How did you know?”

“You’ve risen to where you are due to a lot of hot air, you made a promise you couldn’t keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s my fault.”


 

reality


 

MOMMA ALWAYS SAID

MOMMA.png

AND THAT’S ALL I HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THAT.

Weekend Homework Assignment

The kids filed into class Monday morning. They were all very excited.
Their weekend assignment was to sell something, and then give a talk on salesmanship.

Little Sally led off. “I sold Girl Scout cookies & Imade $30,” she said proudly, “My sales approach was to appeal to the customer’s civil spirit and I credit that approach for my obvious success.”

“Very good,” said the teacher.

Little Debbie was next. “I sold magazines,” she said, “I made $45 and I explained to everyone that magazines would keep them up on current events.”

“Very good, Debbie,” said the teacher.

Eventually, it was Little Johnny’s turn. The teacher held her breath.

Little Johnny walked to the front of the classroom & dumped a box full of cash on the teacher’s desk.

“$2,467,” he said

“$2,467!” cried the teacher, “What in the world were you selling?”

“Toothbrushes,” said Little Johnny.

“Toothbrushes!” echoed the teacher, “How you possibly sell enough tooth brushes to make that much money?”

“I found the busiest corner in town,” said Little Johnny, “I set up a Dip & Chip stand & I gave everybody who walked by a free sample.”

They all said the same thing, “Hey, this tastes like dog crap!”

Then I would say, “It is dog crap. Wanna buy a toothbrush? I used the President Obama method of giving you some crap, dressing it up so it looks good, telling you it’s free and then making you pay to get the bad taste out of your mouth.”

bite a democrat

Little Johnny got five stars for his assignment.